At first I feel bad for a while, but then I just smile

Lily Allen seems appropriate for my post-hockey run down:



Kind of a weird night (apologies in advance for being rambly and stream-of-consciousness here Update: And apparently assholey. Me and my big mouth.).

With Coach Dan out for a few weeks with wrist surgery and several of the usual ringers out for the night, I knew I had my work cut out for me. Mitch and Michelle both played center really well though, broke up a lot of plays. And man, it's fun watching Mitch and Jessica battle. Their styles are really similar, both good defensively and work their asses off in the neutral zone, and they're just a blast to watch duel for the puck.

I was getting really pissed in the first period. A lot of tight passing right in front of me and I just couldn't get over. And then Scott TFCG... Scott lobs one from above the blue line way high and I stick my glove up to try and make sure it defects over the net, but I'm thinking, "That's going over the net either way."

WRONG. Fucker just drops like a sack of shitrocks (my best Mr. Lahey impression) behind me right in the net. It was totally one of those ball-busting shots, especially since it came from Scott and I knew immediately it's gonna take ages to live down.

But I realized on the way home, it was a blessing. Because it made me laugh and just settle down and quit being pissed that I was getting lit up. It was just like, "Okay. It's just a game. You're doing your best. It's not your night." I should have known when my leg pads fell in a huge puddle when I was unloading the car that it wasn't going to be my night, right?

And indeed, it was not. Ultimately 11 goals went past me, but I probably saw twice as many shots as usual. And I had quite a few nice saves.

Two stick saves on Scott. One that I just kinda batted away. Hot. And then one that dinged off the shaft.

The very first shot, which I don't think many folks realized I even got a stick on, was a really fast shot and I tipped it into the corner. Would have been a nasty way to start the game if that had gone in. I was proud of that one.

Made another save on one of Jess's shots with my head. Mask saves are a funny thing... you kinda want them to be hard because it sorta makes your eyeballs rattle around in your head for a second regardless of how hard it is, so if it's a harder shot, at least you know it will deflect further away from danger. I still prefer them to a hit anywhere in the shoulder or upper arm area. This is why I bought a good, heavy mask and didn't skimp. I LOVE my mask. Never had a shot that I couldn't shake off pretty quickly.

Anyway, I heard lots of, "great save" tonight, but lots of "tweet" with Luther's arm pointing at my net, so *shrug* I dunno. Just a really up and down night.

Had two brainfart goals. One that I HAD but didn't know I had it and when I lifted up a little, it popped out and it was a ridiculously easy goal for Jessica. Wish my D would communicate with me when I'm trying to freeze the puck. I'm wearing a lot of shit and I can't always feel the puck. Is that wrong to wish for? Now I'm second-guessing myself.

And one right near the end where, honest to god, I just zoned out. They were battling behind the net and I saw something shiny or thought about bacon or blow jobs or something and the next thing I know, Hot Shot's banged in a wrap-around.

Hot Shot, BTW, is this new guy on the red team who is GOOD and I don't think I've ever stopped him. He and Jessica were dangerous tonight. I think together, they had half the goals. Hot Shot must have had 5 or 6 points at least. I hate him.

Okay, I don't. But it's frustrating.

On the flip side, I actually felt like I worked my ass off tonight. I stayed consistently busy as the red team finally had the manpower to win battles and get it down in my zone and hold the zone. Lots of pressure and lots of shots. I normally feel a little like a spoiled, pampered goalie. Between the green team usually being pretty well stacked and the red team's better players taking pity on me, it often felt a little ... unrealistic.

Well, I got plenty of reality tonight and it's a helluva lot more fun, even if losing and getting lit up sucks. It was a blast.

I've mentioned before that I approach each game with a key to work on and tonight it was, if I'm getting lit up, to not hole up in my crease and play too deep. Stay high and confident regardless, and I felt like I did a good job of that. I had some positioning issues, but I don't know that any of them were because I was too deep. I didn't get sucked into the mental quicksand, so I'm proud of that.

Looong practice next week. And I get to pay extra for the privilege. Yay.