She died doing what she loved

Honestly, I thought that's what they were gonna be saying at my funeral on Thursday. I've never felt so shitty and had to play hockey. And it's not like playing out where you can just dial back and it doesn't matter a whole lot. It's pretty apparent when the goalie is wheezing her last breaths there in the paint.

I woke up from my nap around 6 and felt fuzzy headed and feverish. Got some food in me and then just felt worse and worse on my drive to the rink. Kept having to take breaks while I got dressed, I was so worn down.

It's a practice, so poor Scott's trying to get me to do some lateral movement work and my head is spinning like a top every time I stand up. One bonus of goalie gear is that it's pretty comfortable to just bend over and rest on your gear, so I spent most of the practice tonight like that, just praying for the Good Lord to come and take me already, or make me feel better (the preferred option).

I was dizzy and my heart rate was WAY too high and I couldn't settle it down which made me short of breath, too. My head was throbbing (and still is). Then when I finally do get some breaks where nobody's shooting on me, I'm breaking into cold sweats. Ugh. Just awful.

Finally with about 16:00 left in the scrimmage, I settled down and finally started to feel like I might make it off the ice alive. I made a few good saves... enough to almost-but-not-quite salvage the night... and then Scott scores on me. I'm gonna have his big ol' bobblehead mug, standing over me and grinning ear to ear when I close my eyes for a goddamn week.

What's worse is that I stopped the initial shot AND the first rebound but then Scott banged it in under my pad, which he says wasn't rotated. I don't remember it that way, but whatever. I'll loosen my pads next time and see if that helps them rotate, though I think mostly it was my total inability to focus.

First goal, I was just being lazy. No question. Stupid goal. The second was a bouncy little mother fucker. I don't remember it all that well. Kuny took the blame and I pretty much let him. I don't normally let my D get away with "sorry, that was on me" because I should get them, but tonight, fuck it. Yeah, take the blame. I don't want it.

I can't remember the others, other than Scott's. Were there more? Meh, 3 is plenty for 20 minutes, I'd say. We'll stop there.

Had some decent saves though. One on Jessica, that if she'd just given me a jab in the toe would have been a goal. I thought I had it, but didn't really know where. Somewhere on top of my pad or something. But they called no goal and she was pissed about it, which made me happy. :)

I'm not getting much ice time lately, so I hate to have basically wasted it tonight, but I was thisclose to just telling Dan to put the cone in and just turning around and coming home, so I guess if anything, it was good I muddled through it.

And the work I'm doing on getting my legs stronger is helping. I was up and down a bit and certainly feeling pretty weak all over, but I think my knee only hurt once when I was getting up. Felt good about seeing a little progress there, though I doubt it was perceptible to anyone else.

Hung out for a while after but am still feeling really crappy and run down. Tired but not sleepy. Or something like that. Typical Sunday night bullshit.

Heard a song on the way out there tonight that I wanted to post here but I can't for the life of me remember it. I need one of you peeps with an iPhone to just hang out with me all the time and capture songs for me with that app that recognizes songs for you. Screw putting man on the moon... that's some amazing shit.

Instead, I'll leave you with a link to all the new promos for It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, which is the skankiest, funniest shit ever and is resuming its 5th season in September. Can't recommend it highly enough, assuming you aren't very easily offended.