Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Ego Massage

You were screened, baby. Nobody could have stopped that. That puck had eyes. And have I told you the way your hair sticks out of the holes in the top of your mask is so charming?

*inappropriately long hug*


Yeahhhh, my Brusty had one of those "bug" nights (you know, sometimes you're the windshield and sometimes you're the bug). Three goals on 11 shots in the first period of the Blades game, though one was a stinky breakaway and one was a PP goal. He had several highlight reel saves, but the unfortunate reality of goaltending is that great saves are fleeting and ephemeral. Goals... those go down in black and white.

That's why I said "fuck it" to being humble and stoic when I make a good save. It's going to dissipate like so much water vapor with the next goal I allow. I'm gonna enjoy it while it's still a little bit tangible.

Cameron put Rebound in for the second and third periods, so he got to be the hero goalie and get the win after the rest of the Blades decided to start playing, tied it up, and then won in OT.

BTW, the other goalie was fellow displaced goalie, Miika Wiikman, who also qualifies for Ms.Conduct's Home for Homeless Goalies.


Wild game was on Versus tonight. Of course, I have DirecTV. So I kinda feel like this, minus the face paint:

They won, though. And they beat the Avs, so that's like winning twice. Sorry Nick.


Had fun at drop-in last night, even though I got torched mercilessly in the first half. Teams were way out of balance and the white team just got breakaway after breakaway on me.

Only two goalies, so it was 40 straight minutes of that. Must have gotten 20 breakaways in that time. Just completely unfettered. I was finally waving my glove, like, "Come on. Why not? Bring it!" as they broke free in the neutral zone over and over. Ugh.

But, it was still fun. And normally I hate switching teams midway, but I couldn't get out of that net fast enough. Didn't have any trouble remembering which team was the enemy because they kinda felt like that even when they were MY team...

In general, I didn't play all that well, but I was just happy not to barf, I was working so hard in the first half. Unlike Brusty, I'm pretty well used to being the bug at these Tuesday drop-ins.

Definitely squeezed a good bit of water out of my snappy ShamOMG sweatband at the end, but not a single drop fell down my face for the 1:30 we were out there playing non-stop. That = WIN in my book.

Oh! Today I finally mailed off the sweat bands to those of you who requested them. I've got a few more if someone else wants one. Don't be shy, sweaty goalies! These things ROCK.


Watching intermission feature during Kings game on the the Ice Crew's calendar shoot, and Heidi is interviewing the girls. She asks one, "Have you done any modeling before?" "Yes, but not professionally."

Um. So, you did that recreational modeling? Is that what the pretty people are doing while I'm writing about hockey?

Always enlightening.

Speaking of Heidi, I watched this video when I first started in goal and very distinctly remember thinking, "Goddamnit. She's better than me."

I watch it now and cannot believe I thought that. So, hey, that's improvement, right? I do still go, "HA!" when I make a save just like she does. I save the "that's right, bitches" for the really good saves.

Could they not find a goalie-cut jersey for the girl? Kings practice sweater or something?


Forgot to mention, in my never ending quest for my gear to not smell like ass, I finally broke down and bought a steam cleaner. This one here, because it had really good reviews.

I've read that it's a surefire way to get into even the fingers of your glove and blocker and steam the shit out of the funk-enabling bacteria and kill it dead. I'm hoping it will even work on my stinky chest protector. And then maybe Mr.C won't have to make gagging noises when he goes into the garage while my gear is airing out.

I will, of course, report back on the success of this product for funk eradication.


Snikpip  December 10, 2009 at 3:49 AM  

I was reading slow so my brain got ahead of the text when I got to "And then maybe Mr.C won't have to make gagging noises when he goes...". That made for one hell of a visual before the ol' eyes caught up.

Sn√∂boll  December 10, 2009 at 10:13 AM  

Heeey, I want a sweatband too, gonna need it as I'm about to take up my career as a not-at-all professional goalie again, after a four year-break. Email me back, won't you? :)

Nick  December 10, 2009 at 10:50 AM  

Woo-hoo, I got a shout-out on the blog! ;-) No need to apologize (although I appreciate it), but I can take it. Avs are f'n 0-4 against the Wild so far this season where the Wild stunk it up in the beginning quarter when the Avs were rockin' ... WTF?!? I even rolled in Stewart along with Duchene on my fantasy squad for big phat disappointment, but at least they weren't negative points. It is what it is, but I gotta say I'm not lookin' forward to the 21st. The Wild have the Avs' number this season. At least I can take pride in the fact you value the win enough to count it twice!

I wish all of you DirecTV subscribers would stop crying and just dump 'em—show them where the hockey fans are! Stick it to the man!

Advance thanks for the ShamOMG band, can't wait 'til it gets here so I can try it out!

I can totally relate to your breakaway fest. I yell out to my defensemen "2-1", "3-1" or whatever ('specially when their necks aren't working) so they know the numbers coming back into our zone. It's usually a bad sign when I'm saying "3-1 ... again!".

I'll have to check the video when I get home since that (streaming video) stuff gets blocked here at work. Gotta say I about had stroke yesterday when your site got blocked ... now I can see it today?!

The steam cleaner looks pretty slick. Does anyone in your area have an Esporta (<-google that) machine? I have my gear done about every other season. Costs me about $60 for the full set, but well worth it and sanitizes everything. Even smells good for 3-4 games after the cleaning.

Ms. Conduct  December 10, 2009 at 11:15 AM  

My site didn't work, Nick? Maybe Blogger was having a "moment." Well worth checking out the video at home. It's pretty funny. As much as I find her too chipper most of the time, Heidi has my respect for giving it a try.

I'm not sure I can count fast enough to identify the x-on-xs I was facing. These guys can't seem to show up with either a clearly LIGHT or DARK sweater, so it ends up with "red and white" as LIGHT even though there are guys with powder blue and mint green jerseys on the DARK team. It's all I can do to remember who is good and who is eeeeeevil when they're in my zone.

We're stuck with DTV because Mr.C is a football guy and we must have Sunday Ticket.

Hey Snoboll, what's your email? Or just send me your address to msconduct10 at gmail.

Nick  December 10, 2009 at 9:54 PM  

No, no ... my work blocks 'certain' websites not too mention those that can play videos. No idea why you were blocked, I doubt it was blogger's issue.

Cool video!

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