Friday, March 19, 2010

Under your armor: Goalies, whatchu wear down there?

One of my readers emailed me today and asked about what is the "right" thing to wear under your goalie gear.

It's a subject near and dear to my heart, so now that I have a good excuse to bring it up, here's my take: There is no right answer. Whatever is comfortable, lets you move, doesn't make you too hot, etc.

Personally, I wear yoga pants and a wicking shirt. The yoga pants are cotton, which is pretty stupid because they hold sweat, but I can't seem to want to go to anything else. They're tight everywhere except the ankles, so they don't get twisted up no matter how much I flop around. They don't ever get stinky (they don't hold funk like wicking stuff can). And I don't mind wearing them right to the rink if I'm playing in a place where I don't want to change. They don't look so much like "undergear" as just workout pants.

Also, my hard-earned goalie ass looks delicious in them (okay, not THAT delicious ----->). Thighs, on the other hand... not so much, but whatever. Selective vision never hurt anyone.

Should I discuss commando? Nah. ;)

I absolutely do NOT want my scratchy, rough chest protector touching me. So I wear a long sleeve wicking shirt. Unlike my lower half where I can tolerate cotton, I really, REALLY hate feeling a sweaty shirt on me. So while these do get sweaty, they don't feel heavy and soppy. Yuck.

And of course, a sports bra under that to keep the jugs from going every which way. Sometimes I think being small chested would be a bonus as a female goalie, but frankly, tits and hair are all I've got (and living in Houston, even the hair doesn't always cooperate), so you won't catch me complaining.

I think that's everything.

That said, I've seen all kinds. Lots of folks still wear hockey socks and either a garter or compression shorts like skaters wear. Never tried it but the whole hockey sock thing is clumsy IMO. Seems like they would get twisted or bunched up when you're going up and down or be rough on your legs and knees. No thanks. 

I've heard others wear anything from pajama bottoms to sweatpants. To me, the smartest thing is that skin-tight UnderArmor-style wicking stuff. I've seen a couple of pros who go that route (god bless 'em). They won't budge, will stay light even with tons of sweating, often a little slick to make sure your pads rotate nicely, etc.

Up top, some people wear short sleeves or no shirt at all under their chest protector. I'd rather be hot than let my chest protector touch me all game. If you like to spend money, there's even stuff like this, made especially to protect more vulnerable spots.

So, there ya go. It's really just what feels right and comfortable to you. Like I said, it makes absolutely no sense, as much as we sweat, to wear anything cotton, but there's a point where you really just have to find what works and not worry about whether it makes a ton of sense.

It doesn't make a whole helluva lot of sense to willingly put yourself in front of 90 mph missiles, so I'm assuming "Overcoming Logic" is in all our repertoires, right?

I only pretend to know it all, so feel free to throw in the comments what you like and why. Would be good to get a range of ideas for the "newbie goalie" blog.

8 comments:

buddhafisch  March 19, 2010 at 2:09 PM  

I like a lacy bra and matching panties.

Oh. Wait. That's what I like my fantasy female goalies to wear. Never mind.

I used to wear some loose fitting t-shirt, and some sweat pants. But it's been awhile...

Mason  March 19, 2010 at 2:27 PM  

When I played some street hockey goalie, I'd wear cargo shorts. So aside from my knee-high striped tube socks (which always ended up bunched around the ankles like I was some Japanese school girl), I had nothing between each leg and its respective pad.

And these were crappy street pads, basically consisting of hardended rubber cast over six inches of disgusting, spongy foam. Just groady.

And then I just wore a white undertank under... oh wait, I didn't use a chest protector. I knew I was forgetting an important piece!

Ms. Conduct  March 19, 2010 at 4:02 PM  

Jesus, you guys are a mess. ;)

Casey  March 19, 2010 at 4:09 PM  

The few times I played in net, I wore an Under Armor shirt, compression shirts and my normal hockey socks. Basically, the same thing I wore when I played out.

CircularTheory  March 20, 2010 at 7:29 AM  

T-Shirt
Boxers
Normal socks

So after every practice, my clothes smell like hockey...

Vann  March 25, 2010 at 11:22 PM  

I have worn "goalie" undergarments and just long sleeve shirts, they all work to some extent. I tried the wicking stuff lately, and wow does it reek!

Maalivahti  March 29, 2010 at 8:03 AM  

Great discussion! I go with hockey socks and jill shorts myself, and they don't seem to get twisted up. I put tape around the ankles to keep 'em from riding up.

Up top just a plain cotton t-shirt but it aggravates me just like it does you. I've tried wicking but they end up reeking real fast. So I'm back to cotton.

And yeah small boobies are great for hockey. I think its the only time in my life I've been glad to have 'em. ;)

Ms. Conduct  March 29, 2010 at 8:06 AM  

I had a (pro) guy goalie ask me once about whether it was better to have small or large boobs as a female goalie. He's not the crispest cracker in the box... my answer was, "How would I know? I've only ever had big ones."

My luck, he was a leg man. Bahhhh, stupid leg men. Useless to me.

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