Quick Hits: Havlat, Grease, Khudobin & Aeros Goaltending

Dude. I gotta fucking learn to poke check. That's all I'm saying about drop-in tonight.

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Still amused at the reaction to my last post. Apparently you're a bad person if you call out laziness in a player on the team you support. But a surprising number of people have agreed with me. It's just that the ones who didn't agree took it pretty personally.

If I had $1 for every time I saw negative stuff about MY favorite players... man. But usually what hurts the most is that you know deep down there's some truth there, but it's hard to accept in a player you adore.

Anybody who watches Havlat play for the Wild and can tell me honestly that they think he's working hard all shift, every shift... well.... I can tell you, you're watching through extremely rosy glasses.

He's a very good cherry picker. And I don't care what numbers you put up, I find it an extremely aggravating way to play hockey. At least he stays healthy, I guess. :\

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Was talking to my pal @AWoodMacDonald up in Alberta on Twitter tonight about Darcy Kuemper, who is at the forefront of my mind after the Khudobin trade today pretty much assures that it will be Kuemps and Hackett in net for Houston next season.

It's barely March and I'm already giddy with anticipation about having him in Houston. I asked him what it is about the kid that makes him so good and he said it's "grease."

"He battles. He made a lot of greasy stops, that's what a lot of decent goalies don't do well. Technically sound they are above par, but don't have grease. TT has it, Roy had it, Hasek Had it, Price found it, Brust has it"

I love that word for the "it" that draws me to a goalie. It's some combo of confidence, calm, crazy, ballsy, smart, focused, relaxed... I dunno what all.

But I know this:

Grease is the word.



Now if I could just figure out how to get some of my own (see: Sentence #1 of this post).

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And one last bit on the Khudobin trade, which made for such a busy afternoon/evening, I almost forgot to go to my game tonight.

I was surprised it happened, but only because I predicted it and my predictions never come true:

Of all the positions I could see the Wild trading, it's in goal because of having Endras available next year.

That's what I tweeted this morning. But of course, I long ago said that neither the Wild nor Anton were happily wed anymore and it was time for a divorce. For the Wild, it showed in the Endras signing. For Anton, it showed on the ice.

And I like the Bruins organization an awful lot. I think it's funny that I actually ended up at a game in Providence where he'll be playing. And I think he'll like it there. It's a nice barn that gets loud and can fill up since it's smaller. It's a fantastic change of scenery for him and I hope it re-lights his fire now that he's having to play "hungry" again and impress a whole new crowd of people.

I'm also excited to have Tordjman back. Love him or hate him, he's a string bean of excitement. San Antonio fans warn me that the thrill-a-minute style he has comes back to bite him enough that eventually I'll grow to dislike him. I'm hoping our time together is short and successful enough that this doesn't happen.

I'm interested to see how Hackett responds. Tordjman is the veteran but I'd love to see Hackett take ownership, fly without a net (so to speak), and mature into a pro even more now that Khudobin is gone. It's a tall order and if he doesn't succeed, it's okay. He's a young pup still.

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Public skate, Icy revenge, GoaliesGoaliesGoalies

I hate leaving up such a negative post for so long, but nothing has come along to replace it yet. The lack of novice league on Saturdays is cramping my bloggy style, bitches. But I do love the lack of guilt now that I'm not taking up every Saturday with hockey.

I did get a little ice today though, as Coach Stalin had new skates she wanted to test out before her game tonight. So we hit the public skate and reminded ourselves of why we hate public skate. And amazingly, it's even worse than it used to be now that they've got those awful "walker" things for kids (and some adults) to hold themselves up on the ice with.

I get that skating is scary at first. I was sure I was definitely going to die my first time skating, but IN MY DAY we didn't have those walkers and we learned to skate JUST FINE. :)

The problem is, kids who can't actually skate (read: stop) can actually get up a decent head of steam using these things and then it turns into, like, bumper car day at the retirement home. Walkers crashing into walkers. Total gong show.

I preferred the days when the benders would cling meekly to the boards and people who CAN skate would safely do their twirls and laps in the open space. Not that it ever actually happened like that, as it was actually just as dangerous, but without the SCRAAAAAAPE SCRAAAAAPE SCRAAAAPE of those idiot walkers on the ice.

But one is obligated to romanticize the good ol' days before contraptions ruined everybody's fun.

Anyway, back to today's skate. Of course, Chilly was there hitting on everybody. I pretend I hate it, but I like it. I don't get hit on much, so if you can skate and you want to hit on me, go for it, even with your giant smelly dog outfit on.

Yeah, that's how apathetic about my own phobias in the name of a cuddle I am now. Fake advances from a man in a dog suit. *sigh* FML.

Also, I wore my goalie skates (sans pads), and that is as bad or maybe worse than I remember from the last time I did it. For those who've never worn the gear, goalie skates have a low soft/pliable ankle, so they're pretty unstable. Having your pads strapped to them stabilizes them, but without the pads, it's bender city.

I've seen good skaters who can skate around in goalie skates as well as someone in player skates and frankly, my hat's off to them. I can't figure that out. It's like finding a football player who can do the 40 yard dash in clown shoes as well as someone doing it in regular running shoes.

So, 30 minutes of that was more than enough. I will lovingly strap my pads on Monday night and appreciate my gear for all its wonderful interconnected functionality.

Oh! I also bought a SweetStick. Haven't tried it yet as I plan to get sharpened tomorrow night anyway, but I was happy to find them in stock locally. They're a lot more expensive online for some reason, so I'd been putting it off. Hoping it will help me keep more of a freshly sharpened feeling between games.

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Meanwhile, my OCD brain is still torturing me for Tuesday's game. You can tell me to relax, lighten up, don't take it so seriously, whatever, but it doesn't sink in. I still lay in bed at night and replay Captain Meaniepants's "move" that she keeps beating me on.

I feel like a little kid whose been bullied by the same kid over and over. I'm beyond annoyed or embarrassed. I'm angry. Just blood-boiling angry. Like little Ralphie, who finally snaps and beats the everliving snot out of Scut Farkus.

I have a plan of attack for her move. But I have spies reading so I'll say no more. ;) Gonna practice it Monday night. If I don't shock the hell out of those guys, then I'm doing it wrong.

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Post-Weekend Goalie Update:

Brusty is still fucking awesome, natch. 38 saves (WHERETHEHELLISTHEDEFENSE?) and 4 PIM in his win over Manchester. I asked the AHL about goalie PIM because I was sure he must be leading the league but some how Justin Pogge has 50 PIM. Holy balls! Did he KILL someone on the ice?

Brusty is only halfway there, so I think he's gonna have to partake in a bench clearing brawl and probably carve some poor soul up with his stick blade to catch him. I vote for Sheldon Souray as the carvee!

Jaeger had a shutout the other day that ended in a 15-0 score. What the everliving hell? The other team also got beat 18-something a few weeks ago. I'd spend my free time drunk and on suicide watch if I were their goalie.

At some point, wouldn't it just be better to have your goalie do the splits on the goal line and have all 5 of the rest of them crowd the front of the net like a wall to keep pucks out? That's gotta be more effective than whatever they're doing.

Keumper is the best goalie in the history of the CHL. Okay, maybe not, but he's just having the sickest season  ever. He should change his first name to Can'tsolve because that's what's before his last name in every article I read. "Warriors can't solve Kuemper" etc. Kid is so money. I hope all this success isn't fucking him up.

Hackett's growing on me. Little by little. Anton is doing whatever the opposite of that is. Sorry kid. Time for the ol' change of scenery, I think.

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Ozzie and Drop-in Tilt-a-Whirl

Chris Osgood isn't one of my favorite goalies, but 400 wins in the NHL is a tremendous accomplishment. My friend Justin, who has taught me SO much about watching goalies but still has more goalie knowledge in his pinkie finger than I ever will, has a great post on Osgood today.

Even though I'll admit to being lumped into the masses of underappreciators when it comes to Ozzie, I obviously relate to having that one goalie who embodies the position and was the catalyst for what is sure to be a lifelong passion. Ozzie is Justin's Brusty (minus the lusty part), so I enjoyed his tribute to him on multiple levels and thought it was worth passing along.

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Drop-in was a circus last night. First half behind the white team was a nightmare. I think I made 3 stops the whole 30 minutes. It was breakaways and odd man rushes from the outset, which undermined my mental toughness a bit. Not to mention, one of the dark players really got under my skin in warm-ups by beating me on every shot he took. And he was the one doing most of the cherry picking. Grr.

The goalie switch couldn't come fast enough for me. And it turns out I was justified in my irritation because it was like an entirely different game at the other end. I had great defense and, in turn, I played really well. The white team, as hapless as they were defensively, sure knew how to hold the zone, so I stayed pretty busy and played better for it (though my knee is paying today, dammit!)

Had some sick saves in the second half. My best was on a breakaway, the kid tried to cut across from my blocker side to my glove side. He got the shot off right over my pad, but I had my glove there and trapped the puck in my glove and then pinned it against the side of my outstretched leg pad. Snazzy.

And one of my defensemen told me I need to put Stickum in my glove after I bobbled the puck like 3 times on a save. Doh! It was classic and stick figure worthy, but I'm too lazy. Finally pinned the damn thing against my chest and we had a laugh. I'm so hopeless glove-side, it's non-stop comedy.

Anyway, women's league tonight. I'm a little bit walking wounded today, but it's mostly just turning my head sharply and walking up stairs that hurts. Maybe that will save me from getting drunk after the game tonight if we win. Then again, there's an elevator up to the bar....

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Jaeger interview & goalie porn for the guys!

First off, I wanted to pimp what I thought was a pretty interesting interview for InGoalMag with my boy Brett Jaeger, who's over in the UK playing for Coventry in the EIHL.

We had a long chat last week (Skype is awesome) and it was interesting to learn about that league as it doesn't get much attention over here.

I think it's good to hear from players who are not necessarily NHL prospects and may bump around the minor leagues their whole careers, but do pretty well at it. He's a real student of the position and works really hard to hone his craft. It's just interesting to hear what all goes into it.

Anyway, I thought it turned out pretty good, if a bit long. But there was a little something in every question that I thought people might find interesting, so I didn't want to cut much.
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Also, since I'm normally spazzing over hot goalies, I figured I'd throw something out there for the boys.

Other than being quite fond of boobies, I'm a fan of the penis and wouldn't play for the other team, but damn... as someone with a goalie fetish, these pics from The Fourth Period pressed my buttons pretty good.

Enjoy, fellas.

I, uh... I gotta go take care of something... *ahem*

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Pimping Maalivahti

If you enjoy the rantings of an amateur goalie (like you mostly find here), please to read my girl Maalivahti (Finnish for "goalie" because she's crazy for the Finns) and her awesome blog. She had me giggling today with this:

After randomly musing [on Twitter] about the way Lundqvist reportedly has his skates cut, I got this IM from [a friend]: "You understand that reading your tweets is like walking directly into the chasm of the Goalie Brain, right?" Hmmm. He's right. So be it.

It's honestly how my brain works. It's kind of like this: work thought - work thought - work thought - check twitter - work thought - work thought - OMG holy crap I just figured out something I was doing wrong on the ice!!! - work thought - work thought - Rask - Rask - Lundqvist - VarLAmov - work thought - Lehtonen - Rask - Kiprusoff - Rask - work thought.... etc.

It's ok though, because on Twitter I've found a little cadre of people whose brains all work the same way. Mostly. Just substitute "Brust" for "Rask" in one person's case. Actually, substitute "Brust" for all of them. (hee hee hee).

I don't Brusty know who Brusty she's talking Brusty about there Brusty.

Anyway, I can count on one hand the number of blogs I stop everything I'm doing and read every word of when I find a new post, but hers is one of them.

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Back to novice tonight after missing the last 3 weeks. A game, thankfully. Don't feel like being bossed around today.

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Braggin' on my goalie

So, while the Aeros soiled the bed at home this weekend, Brusty and the Baby Senators found their game on the road. I'mma tell you about it because I'm pretty proud of him.

It all starts with Mike Brodeur getting run and bonking his head last weekend. Welcome to Concussionville, Mikey! So he's out, and Brusty gets a start at home last Saturday. Yay!

Tweet!

Well, yay turns into boo when we discover that the rest of the team is Bad At Hockey and it ends up such a mess that Venice sinks an extra inch into the Adriatic Sea.

But never fear, Binghamtonians! Rookie phenom Robin Lehner has finally gotten his visa squared away and will be in town to start the next game. Phew!

But alas, Pascal Leclaire, being Pascal Leclaire, found a way to break himself. God bless him. I mean that. I hate that he's so fragile but he's really and truly Mr. Opportunity for everyone behind him. Anyway, it's some kinda groin thing with some kinda indefinite timeline that they're checking into this week.

Whyyyy? Whyyyyyyyyy?

Regardless, that meant that Lehner spent all of about 3 days in Bingo before getting called up on an emergency basis. But first! They let him get a game in for Bingo to get his game speed going. But that didn't go so well, as he got lit up just as bad as Brusty did in the last game. Guess he is what he is, too.

After the game, Lehner heads to meet the Senators in Montreal and Brusty is finally a #1 goalie in the AHL again and all is right with the world. And just to prove it, he holds the Crunch to 2 (from what I hear, very nice) goals. It's a loss to the Crunch but only because Bingo can't freaking score.

Rawr.

Regardless, finally, the score is less footbally and my friend in the stands (see Chairman How's Glorious Army) told me Barry played great. But apparently he was also quite drunk (my friend, not Barry). Never the less, I trust his judgment in goaltending quality through the boozy haze.

Even the boards in Syracuse know what's up.

The road trip continues up to Toronto where things get really good, because not only is Brusty pretty much the only choice to play (other goalie is an emergency backup) but the game is being broadcast on CBC in Canada and NHL Network in the US.

Holy crap, I get to watch Brusty! I really believe the hockey gods love me and want me to be happy that they knocked out all those other guys to make this happen. But to be honest, I've only watched the first period. I had to shut 'er down because of computer issues and the TV was taken up with football. But it's on my DVR and I've already marked it KEEP. If I could have marked it OMG KEEPKEEPKEEP!!!, I would have. You know this is gonna be up there with The Princess Bride and Office Space for "Number of Watches" before long.

What I do know is that it went amazingly well. He stopped 41 of 42 shots, 18 of which were in the 3rd period, and they won 3-1. He also got the first star, natch, and hopefully enjoyed a little skate with a big grin and lots of Marlies fans hating him for being so fucking awesome in their barn. So clutch.

I'm gonna guess we're looking at the aftermath of a poke here. Shaaaahhhh. I like the new pads.

More cool pics of the game here. The lighting is weird for these shots, like they're in the sun almost. Gives them a strange paparazzi-ish quality that I kinda like.

Anyway, that's the Brusty Report. It's just one game and when everybody's healthy again, I don't know what happens after that. But it was one game on the biggest stage the B-Sens will play on all season and he made the point he spent all last season trying to make. Not only does he belong in this league (or better), he can dominate it.

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Purple Power; Goalie Introductions

I'm in a little bit of a post-awesome-game euphoria tonight. This was by far the most fun I've had at women's league. I played for the purple team for the first time and they were short-handed by a full line vs. the green team that not only had their best players but even had one of the better women players I know dropping in to play with them.

So, lots of talent on that green team but my team had more heart and patience, and they just hustled and hustled and I made some timely saves and we got the win. I know it can't be this way all the time, but it sure does feel great when the stars align like they did tonight. I'd go into battle with these gals any day.

As usual, the save I made that I deemed absolutely mind-blowingly amazing got no reaction from anybody. I guess you have to be a goalie to understand what all went into it, so I'll break it down for my goalie friends so someone besides me can appreciate it.

One of the best players on the green team picks the puck off one of my girls in the NZ and carries it in pretty much on a breakaway, though my D were on her tail so she had to keep moving and couldn't set up.

But she's quick and a good skater and good hands, so she's coming at me from the blue line on a little bit of an angle but on my glove side. But the way her body and stick are looking, she's projecting that she's going to try and sweep across the top of my crease and get me moving and hope I'll either bite too early or not get over quick enough and she'll try to pop it in high blocker side before I can get there.

So I read this from her body language and I. just. stay. with. her. I don't even remember when I dropped into the fly or how I got over, I just know I stayed in front of that puck, and when she tried to pop it in just inside the post, I put that blocker up just in the nick of time and batted it into the corner, Bob's your uncle!

*crickets* (And for the record, even the most retarded, ugly, easy saves get cheers from these gals, cuz they're nice like that)

And I'm thinking, "Shit, that might be the best save I ever made." Sure, mundane blocker save but to read the shooter perfectly and react perfectly... I rarely put it all together like that! LOL Oh well, as long as I appreciate it. So much I stick figured it....

Apologies if I made anyone pregnant with that save. It's a gift and a curse.

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The other thing is that, as I mentioned, I'm pretty jacked for the season about now, but it's still a solid month before Aeros pre-season starts and I get to see live, professional hockey again.

I heard the song below and was thinking how I really like this song but it seems like more of a shooter song. And then I was thinking if hockey players had some equivalent of an "at bat" song, this would be a cool one, lyrically anyway. Not exactly a beat that makes you wanna crush skulls, so maybe not.

Anyway, that led me to think about the goalie introductions and how that's one of my favorite parts of a game. I got chills thinking about it.

The spotlight, the announcer, "AND, IN GOAL, NUMBER 35, ANTON KHUUUUUUUDOBIN" or whoever.

It's dorky but I always get nervous before games. Almost as nervous as when I play my own games, sometimes more. And the goalie introduction is the absolute height of my nervousness. They're standing there in that spotlight, separate from the team, the most pivotal guy on the ice.

I wonder what he's thinking right then. What a moment.

Man, I love hockey. October just can't get here fast enough.

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Draft Day 1: Jack Campbell to the Stars

Well, I got my wish, or as close as I was going to get short of the Wild drafting him, which was highly unlikely. The Dallas Stars picked goalie Jack Campbell, which means I'll get to see him a whole bunch with the Texas Stars once he turns pro.

I'm trying to temper my excitement a little bit, because he is just a kid and there has been a great deal of hype around him due to his play in the World Juniors, but if he continues on his current trajectory of success, I think he'll be golden.

It's so rare for a prototypical Ms. Conduct goalie to come along, especially in this day of "I've been working with a goalie coach since I was 6 and I'm technically flawless and boring" robot goalies. But like my favorites, the kid is athletic and has undeniable flair.

What's more, he's a big game goalie who thrives under pressure. He's big on puck handling (*swoon*) and Marty Turco is his idol. I know Marty's had a rough couple of years, but I approve. You can idolize a player and still acknowledge and learn from their mistakes just like (hopefully) they do themselves.

What's more, I've talked to Mike Valley, the Stars goalie coach, and I'm familiar with his philosophy, and there's not another goalie coach in the league, who I'd be happier to see working with Campbell. I have total faith that Valley won't coach the uniqueness out of Campbell's game.

So, he's the whole package for me. And he seems to be a pretty good talker, too, at least for now. Here's a transcript of the interview with him after he was drafted. And here's a fantastic audio interview from Justin at the The Goalie Guild just a short while after Campbell won the gold.

And here's The Goalie Guild's analysis of the pick.

I was really disappointed to see Turco leave the Stars (though it's totally understandable on both sides). I've never been able to completely cotton to the Stars even though they're the "local" NHL team, but I still watched them a lot because of Turco (and also I love Razor's color on the broadcast). So I'm really happy they picked up the most exciting goaltending prospect to come through in a long while, IMO.

But now for the hard work of living up to these expectations. In a position where many guys don't hit their prime until their late 20s, it's still a crap shoot, but I love this roll of the dice.

 

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Goalie thighs and other happy places

I'm gonna go ahead and admit that one of my big fascinations with pro goalies is, well, their thighs. Like (god, I can't believe I'm saying this) in my little goalie fantasies, there is definitely some thigh fondling going on. That little fetish didn't start until I started playing goal myself and realized how much thigh strength is required to do many of the simplest things as a goalie. Like, getting up and down, lateral pushes, and of course, that wide, low stance.

That's what made me think of this. Watching Rask stop Leino's penalty shot, they showed a replay from behind the net and I was blown away by how low and wide his stance was, yet he was still mobile. And my first thought was, "Oh my fuck, the groins on that guy!"



It really is just astounding.

Meanwhile, I'm going to get my weak little, completely-not-worth-fondling thigh muscles prodded to death by my wonderful MT tomorrow. Only 30 minutes scheduled because I can't take an hour of that kind of abuse. Really hoping my knee gets some relief, even if other things have to be in pain to do it.

She commented that I take the pain pretty well, but myofacial release on groin muscles is different from calf muscles. I guarantee I'll be going to my happy place and doing some yoga breathing to get through it.

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My happy place used to be in a hammock on a beach, but now it's press row at hockey. That's completely dysfunctional, I'm pretty sure, but I just don't care.

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So I've been working so much this week, I realized today, I haven't left my house since Monday. Today, I finally walked out the door and took the dog around the block. My neighbor was nice enough to roll my garbage can up to the front of the house. My mailbox was stuffed to the gills (all junk, thanks).

At least tomorrow I get to leave for a couple of hours since I have a couple of errands to run after my MT appointment.

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Jaroslav Halak is sending me loves notes. He defends his crease, he makes ballsy passes up the ice, he challenges out in the CIRCLES, bitches. WTF? Who has the stones to play like that when your season is on the line? Only a really confident sonofabitch, that's who. God bless him.

I hate to be a bandwagoner but he makes me wanna riot in the streets. I'm not sure he's human. I think he may be a long lost Sedin. Part zombie, part robot. I dunno.

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I honestly do not care who win the Flyers-Bruins game seven. I'm just happy it went to that, so Montreal gets a little rest. But I guess this means no hockey tomorrow night. Reminds me of the day not far off when there will be no hockey any night. I hate that day.

But by then, I will have my Toskala t-shirt and that will sustain me for weeks. Maybe months.

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My new nightly bedtime routine is to catch up on the Jays with Mike Wilner's blog and podcast of his post-game radio show. Man, what a bunch of idiots that call in. Apparently lots of people don't like him because he does come off kinda cocky, but frankly, when you're so much more logical than everybody else you're interacting with, I think cockiness is unavoidable.

I totally meant to work some more before bed tonight, but that plan turned into this, and now Mr. Wilner and his idiot caravan of callers are singing to me instead. Goodnight!

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Vesa is Mine

Did you ever notice Vesa rearranged is Save?

Anyway, I just ordered this shirt. If you know me, you don't I don't part with money easily when it's for stuff I don't really need, but when I saw this on Twitter for $6, I knew I'd regret it forever if I didn't buy it.

The fact that this shirt even exists is funny, much less a sieve like me wearing it. It's aces. Just 110% aces, my friends. I cannot wait for it to get here. And for $9.99 shipping, it better fuckin' get here in a hurry.

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Goodbye and Good Luck, Brahmas

Well, my boy Brett Jaeger is done for the season. The Texas Brahmas lost their series with Odessa last night in game 6. I didn't look at the final shot count but at the end of regulation, it was 43-23 in favor of Odessa. Talk about some defense that isn't doing their goalie any favors.

Apparently they'd lost their two best defensemen prior to the playoffs and were struggling on the back end. And then last night, their top scorer got a game misconduct, so that didn't help matters. Dumbass. The final for the game was 5-4 though, so I'm sure his goaltending was the only thing keeping it that close.

Not the most consistent year for him, and there were as many low points in the season as high points, but hopefully he'll get a good contract somewhere next year. They really seem to like him there in Dallas, so maybe he's back? Either way, he's gotten some valuable exposure to the hockey ops people for the Aeros, so that's good for him when they're looking around for goalie call-ups in the future.

Joe Palmer, his partner this season, was probably a little more consistent but never really won the #1 job as a rookie. He's Blackhawks property though, so maybe we'll see him in Rockford next year. He only had one call-up and never got in a game with Rockford, so it remains to be seen what he can do at the next level.

Anyway, congrats to those guys on a good season.

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Meanwhile, on a totally different subject, my project for today, apart from work, is to see if I can fit all my gear, including my pads, into my hockey bag or if I need a bigger bag to go to Minnesota (and could I get one from the Aeros after the season if so.... hmmm). Update: Yay! It all fits, with room for my skates and undergear, if that won't fit in my carry on!

Also need to pick up my skates at some point. I had a dream last night that they did some kind of effed up sharpening on them and tried to pass it off as this great new technique. I obviously have a ton of faith in them....

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BEHOLD!

There ya go. No more "scrollingrealfast" down the page. We're making Grammar work for you, ladies. Atta boy, Grams. Stay thirsty, my friend.

Big props to Wrap for spotting the Animated GIF beacon I sent up and busting this beauty out. You rule, as always. Go Chiefs! ;-)

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Brain litter and more goalie porn!

Here's a post that demonstrates why Dan Ellis, Preds goalie and goofball, is my favorite NHL Tweeter. As usual, goalies represent and Mike McKenna is likewise the best AHL Tweeter. He was sewing up his dog's toys with dental floss the other day. Christ, that's adorable.

Don't be afraid of the Tweets, my friends. Twitter is fun. And anybody who harshes your mellow? You just unfollow their tweety little asses. Thank God for that. Of course, that goes both ways, doesn't it? :)

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Speaking of goalies, Backstrom is hurt, Harding sucks, Brusty is broken. So, could Khudobin go to Buffalo, Dubie start in Houston, and Scruffy get a call up? Oh my.

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And now for something completely different. This is a masterpiece of cheesiness that just seems worthy of .... something..Probably NSFW, but still relatively tame all things considered.





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John "Grammar" Grahame was back in action in Milwaukee Wednesday and Chris "No Homo" Jerina was a good sport and snapped a few more money shots for our enjoyment.

"Goalie hard work. Grammar thirstyyyyyy..."

"Mmmm... nom nom nom"

"Ahhhh. Okay, camera guy looking? Here we go."

"See how hot Grammar is, ladies?"

"You gettin' this, picture boy?"

"Just reinforcing how hotttttt Gramar is. Am I steaming?"

"Ahhhh, ready to get scored on some more"

Seriously though, Grammar, swallow some of that water next time.

Oh and if that wasn't enough, just to finish 'er off:

Ohhhh sweet Grammar Grahame. Thank you for amusing the goalie lusting faithful with your thirsty, hot, wet, flexible, camera-friendly self. I don't care how many goals you let in (but seriously dude, that was a lot), you're still a winner in my book.

And as always, many thanks to Chris "Aim to Please" Jerina for the photography.

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Jeff Deslauriers & Inspiration

I've got goalies on the brain. More than usual. Which is a lot, if you know me by now.

I realized last night, that with Brusty not playing, I've got no "inspiration" goalies to watch, and I find myself really missing that, both as a fan and a player.

I realized this while watching Jeff Deslauriers in goal for the hapless Edmonton Oilers last night. He was unbelievable. Doing everything I find completely charming in a goalie. He battles his ass off and does everything he can to get in front of the puck. Some saves are so unreal, I think opponents don't capitalize on rebounds because they're so shocked it didn't go in.

Not to mention the personality stuff... scrum near the net and he doesn't wander off. He gets in there and pokes a guy with his blocker. A couple of quirks I've noticed is that he lifts his mask a LOT, and he wedges his stick in the thigh rise of his pad rather than under his arm when he needs to free his hands up.

Silly stuff, I know, but man, so many NHL goalies are so boring, it's a complete delight to discover one who is a little different.

But bless his heart, he's not perfect. His team is a putrid mess and no matter how focused and disciplined he is, it's really hard to to hold up under that kind of pressure. And as this excellent article points out, he can be his own worst enemy at times.

But he's a rookie who has truly been thrown to the wolves. It's one thing to be thrown into the #1 spot on good NHL team (Hi Jimmy Howard), but another thing entirely to have to make your name backstopping a disaster like the Grease.

And yes, I know they beat the Wild. That's not the point.

The point is, I'm impressed as hell with this kid. The Oilers have bent and bent and bent him and he doesn't break. Compare him to Carey Price last year. Beat down by his bad team, the Montreal media, etc. Swept up in the high profile nature of his position. He lost focus badly. But Deslauriers, though not in the fishbowl of Montreal, does his work in a hockey mad Canadian city and still exhibits confidence and moxie and competitiveness this late in a futile season.

To me, it's glorious. I don't know what will happen with him down the road, but I'm completely inspired and I can't wait to see where his career goes.

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Quick (really quick) Hits

I don't really have much to say, but I get antsy when I've had a single post up too long. Especially when the subject is in LOLcatspeak. That's cute for like a day. We're going on 3 now.

Buncha quick hits:

My dog, who is 8 years old, got groomed... like proper groomed by the kind of people who know how to make poodles look like topiaries... for the very first time yesterday and he's such a priss now!

I'm not sure if he just SEEMS prissy because he looks so neat and trim or because he knows how good he looks and he really is being a priss. He's such a "rugged" looking dog normally.... it's jarring when a dog has a better manicure than his owner.

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Super excited about this weekend in sports. Excited about the Wild because Cody Almond is up and eager to see how he fares. Love to see all my pimping backed up with the big club. The kid is the whole package IMO.

Also, of course, the Olympics start. To be honest, I don't much care about anything but hockey. No figure skaters have done any kneecapping lately, so ... meh.... Mostly when I see all those talented skaters twirling around out there, I just wish more girls would play hockey. At least there'd be fewer divots in the ice. *grumble*

However, Russo is covering some of the winter events apart from hockey, and as I've often said, it's just such a thrill to watch someone who is the best in his league doing his job and loving it. This blog post tonight from Vancouver was about 18 different things, completely jacked up on coffee, and an awesome read. It proves to me that there's nothing Russo could write about that I wouldn't read. He's just good.

Finally, the Aeros have 3 in 3 at home this weekend and it looks like they're going to keep Khudobin up in Minnesota for the weekend, which means Brusty gets a start or two. And that means I'm happy for a few more days. And then Mean Mr. Mill will make bitter bunny bitter again. (There's gotta be a children's book in this right? I could do it all in jaggedy stick figures. It would be awesome. Maybe I'll do a short version as a blog post sometime.)

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I have plans to interview the goalie coach of the Dallas Stars system next week. Great timing huh? I'm excited to talk to him. Usually when I interview, I have trouble coming up with questions.

I'm a terrible interviewer because a) if I'm genuinely interested in learning about someone, I don't want surface stuff. I want to really know what makes them tick, but it's hard to get there without building some trust, and that requires coming in through the front door, conversationally speaking.

And b) if I'm not genuinely interested in learning about someone, I have a hard time faking otherwise.

But in this case, I may have too many. My focus will be on the AHL level but gosh, you just can't ignore what's going on with Turco and Lehtonen and Auld.... a little goalie threesome up there in Big D.

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STOP RAINING! NOW!

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My new cat eye cage still hasn't shown up. You'd think ordering something from freaking Canada is like ordering it from Iran or something for how long it takes to get here. Come on, customs people, it's just a cage. Get on it!

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Awesome segment on ABC 13 tonight about Jeff Crawford, the Aeros practice goalie who nearly had to step in and play when Brusty got sliced last week. (May I just interject that I've watched that injury happen like 3 times in the last 24 hours and it still sends shivers up my spine every time. *shudder* The injury happens so fast, you don't eve know it's happened... it's when he goes to get up that my heart drops to my stomach every single time I see it.) Good job by the PR guys for getting a cool story out there.

Hopefully there's video soon, but if not, I'll record it off of TV and share it at T3I.

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I'm finally convinced that I'm being ridiculous skating on a 1" hollow (hush, stop laughing). So I'm going to start ramping the hollow up.

Honestly, tough, I'm not a very patient ramper-upper, so I may not even bother with 1/8th increments and just go right to 3/4 for the first sharpening. Holler at me if that's insanity, but if it's just a matter of being awkward for a few sessions... well, I already am, so no biggie.

But the more I thought about the following comment from Mike McKenna over at IGM, the more I started thinking about how the very things I'm having trouble with revolve around using my edges. I hardly have edges with my current sharpening!

Q: Isn’t the 1/4” – 3/8” hollow in the skates pretty aggressive for a goalie? I thought most goalies used at least 1/2? hollow to make it easier to glide side-to-side? – Steve

A: Not really. Almost every pro goalie is around 1/2” or under. By gliding side-to-side I presume you mean shuffling. Today’s goalies never shuffle more than a foot or two at a time and it’s very controlled. T-pushes and power-pushes (movements while down in the butterfly) require sharp edges if you want to have any kind of explosiveness. I’ve been sharpening my skates like this for nearly eight years, so it’s not that new of a concept. Unfortunately many pro shops don’t understand the needs of modern goaltenders and their ‘goalie cut’ (or standardized goalie hollow) is often 1” or higher. Scary.

I'm excited to try it and see what it does for me ... or to me... Hah. Hopefully I can get it done by Sunday and get to try it out in practice.

I asked one of my pro goalie pals what his hollow is and he doesn't even know. Amazing. I sometimes wonder how some of these guys would survive without an equipment manager to take care of them. Must be like herding cats. Really buff cats with great asses, though, so it's not like I'm tossing any pity their way.

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Aaaaand with that hockey player ass reference, I think I've done my job here for the evening.

Apropos of my day:

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Harding and the goalie food chain

Josh Harding was a freaking STUD tonight. I wasn't even planning on posting tonight but shit, he was clearly in pain with just about every move and still managed to get a shutout. It was an epic, Kerri Strug-esque performance. (I'm probably insulting one or the other in making that comparison, but I mean it in the best possible way, while still sort of mocking Josh because I'm mean like that.)

Anyway, first star and a shutout for that guy and well earned.

But this certainly makes things interesting. My boy Jaeger might wanna keep his phone on him where ever he is in bumfuck CHL, because neither Backs nor Hards seem to be in particularly good shape.

If the goaltending experience is remotely universal, Harding had adrenaline in his favor tonight, which dulls pain. Imagine, with all the grimacing he was doing WITH the adrenaline (and whatever superman painkillers they'd put in him), how he's gonna be feeling in the morning. Ouchy hips make everything hurt. It's one of those deep pains. You can't ice it. It just sits there ... hurting. Ugh. I feel for him.

But the whole team just played their nuts off. It reminded me of some of the heroic defensive performances of the Aeros two years ago, back when all they had was great goaltending and gutsy defense. God, I loved that team.

I'm watching the recap of the game on On the Fly, though, and there was no appreciation for what Harding really did there. Was kinda like, "Well, normally they mostly suck so this was kind of a fluke because they have Colorado's number." Pfft. Kevin Weekes would have nailed recapping that game. Not kidding. Everything he does that isn't goalie-related is intensely uncomfortable, but his goalie commentary is often pretty good.

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Still, that means Brusty is in the AHL where he belongs (at the very least). So as much as I feel for Harding, I also feel like the planets are aligned again.

Ha! They just said, "He loves to ride the hot goaltender" on OTF. Who wouldn't? *sigh*

Anyway, Brusty's in Milwaukee. No clue where it goes from here, but I'm feeling mellow about the whole thing. It's all gonna be fiiiiiiiine.

Here's a pretty cool video of Brusty's greatest hits (and some warmups?) put together by the Blades, who are surely crying in their beer at the moment. Not only is the music funktastic, but you also get to see how often he gets run by his own fucking team. Honest to god, those boys need to learn to stop. I've never seen a goalie get run by his own team more. He's not a tackling dummy, guys, he's a person.

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Gonna try something new here. Like how I made my bitterness cute with sweet, fuzzy animals, I'm gonna try and make my my aching knees and other lamentations sexy:

I totally knew a change in the weather was coming tonight thanks to my knees feeling crummy.


How's that working? I think repetition is key. We'll see.

Buenos noches, gatitos....

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The Hip

We'll see what happens. Harding's injury will need to last a while for Brusty to be required. The team is set for goalies, even if Anton gets called up (because Backstrom The Headcase and Anton The Winless are a great tandem), until Wednesday when they play in Chicago. If Anton's still up then, they'll need to recall Barry.

So I suspect you lusty Bladers will still get him through the weekend regardless for the games against Gwinnett.

Meanwhile, Woody focused on Barry in his Blades article today and it's a good read. Though I had to laugh at the irony of reading it as I was finding out Harding was hurt. Heh.

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Um, and not to distract from the issue at hand, but my new goalie half-boyfriend Alex Stalock has a really excellent interview here. The only thing he got wrong: Star TREK. Come on. Embrace your inner nerd, Al. Even the cool kids have an inner nerd.

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The one where I blog to avoid housework

Boy, you can really tell when Mr.C is out of town for a long time. I get severe diarrhea of the blog.

Stuff on my mind, because you need to know:

My throat is still sore. I otherwise feel pretty good and the coughing fits are getting less severe and frequent, but the throat nags. Kinda wonder if the antibiotics didn't quite lick the strep. I took my last pill this morning, so we'll see how it goes from here.

I understand that having tonsils removed as an adult is quite painful, but dang if I'm not about ready for that.

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Mark Dekanich was awarded Goalie of the Week for the ECHL... during his "get your act together" assignment to Cincinnati in which he allowed only 1 goal in 2 games. And then was promptly sent home, possibly with a "CURED" stamp on his forehead.

I have to look at that through my fingers. It's too awkward to stare right at. Yeesh.

Reminds me of when we flipped our car up north of High Level, Alberta and totaled the rental car. Blessedly, our insurance covered the whole monstrous bill, so we didn't really mind when they sent us a "cleaning fee" bill for $50, even though clearly there was nothing to clean.

And then one day we get a letter of apology saying they billed us the cleaning fee in error and to disregard it.

Not sure why it reminds me of that. Something to do with being in a crappy situation, then being rescued from it, and then having some absurd twist at the end.

I wore my Edmonton Eskimos sweatshirt that I got on that trip to hockey last night. It's huge on me because I had to be able to fit it over my arm in a sling after the wreck, but I love it. It's like a Canadian Detector. They never fail to comment. Way too warm for it though. Snow one day, sweaty the next. Houston winter.

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Last night of my 3 in 3 tonight. I really need to make a drinking buddy in that crowd because by the end of that grind, I want a little mind eraser. Kinda hard being the only girl though... Not interested in mixing ANY signals with this bunch.

I've come to realize that my Tuesday is like Friday for most people. Right now, I feel this sense of "relief is on the way." I love playing goal but it is draining 3 days in a row, especially as tightly wound as I get about it, and especially as hard as Tuesdays can be.

So to have my "tour of duty" behind me for the week.... to not have to do a load of stinky hockey laundry every day... to eat a real dinner instead of a late lunch, praying it will last until midnight... to not have to fight the sleepies all day long after being up until 2 or 3 letting the adrenaline wear off... to get to wallow in my Center Ice subscription from start to finish in the evening. Ahhhh. It's heaven.

But of course, I wouldn't appreciate it nearly as much if I could do that every night, so the contrast is good and welcome.

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Finally, I tweeted this earlier today, but I adore Katebits. She's got the kind of fan heart that I had before I had to "temper" it in order to write about the team with some objectivity. (Swear to god, this IS the tempered version.) You don't even have to be a Sabres fan to appreciate the place she's coming from. We've all been there.

One day your team can get you pregnant just by casting a glance in your general direction and the next day you want to kick 'em all in the jewels with pointy boots. Ahhh, the roller coaster of fanhood. Only she's way funnier about it.

Also, you might need to know that "Crunchy" is Ryan Miller. I've never found an adequate explanation as to why that is, but ultimately it's worked for me to just embrace it anyway.

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Okay, I'm out of material. Cannot put off tidying up the house any longer. Then again, I wouldn't mind a nap. :D

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Ms.Conduct is here for you, goalies

Carolina placed Michael Leighton on waivers today, adopting with some permanence Manny Legace as Cam Ward's backup once he returns from his leg-slicing (criiiiinge) injury on Wednesday.

Assuming he doesn't get picked up (name an NHL team that needs him), add him to a growing list of goaltenders who are being shoved down the depth charts in their organizations. Valiquette was the most recent at the NHL level before him.

And every time that happens in the NHL, an AHL goalie gets the shaft, and then an ECHL goalie gets the shaft. The lower you go in the hierarchy of leagues, the more painful it gets for a player... all the way to not having a job at all.

This is great for fans of lower minor leagues, who only stand to benefit from the "underemployed" goalies being thrust into their welcoming arms. Roster moves at that level seem to always be "best player moving up" rather than "upgraded player coming down." So, from that perspective, there's a tiny part of me that's happy for those fans.

Naturally, however, the other 95% of me just feels goddamn awful for these goalies who are being shuttled down to leagues that are below the level where they've proven they can be successful. They're suffering not only the professional disappointment and usually a less-than-stellar travel schedule, but also being away from home for weeks on end, never really knowing when they'll get back, living in a hotel, fitting in with a new team, and a bevy of other inconveniences.

Chris Holt is one of those goalies. He lost the numbers game in the Senators organization, but Pascal Leclaire's broken face was a lucky break for Holt, who finally got the call up to Binghamton from Elmira and has had 2 shutouts in 3 games up with Bingo. But eventually Leclaire's face will become one with itself again and Holt will likely head back up the road to Elmira

Michael Sharp, the Baby Sens beat writer, asked Holt about his experience in the ECHL.

"Elmira was a great experience. There's a lot more work down there for a goaltender in that league, you know, all across the board. All the goalies have a lot more -- there's a lot more high quality scoring chances there. And so, when I come up here, and have a team that plays as sound defensively as our team, it makes for a little bit of an easy transition. It feels like a little bit of an easier game than it does down there."

And as I've blogged about here, I've seen the same thing with Brusty in Florida. Hell, I see it in my own games... the less organized the hockey, the harder it is to play goal. And the lower level hockey you having playing in front of you, the less organized it is.

In the end, all you can really do about it is take what's thrown at you and try to have fun anyway and play hard in hopes that someone above you in the pecking order will have a fall from grace--or a high ankle sprain--and you'll take their job.

But sometimes you just can't be all "stiff upper lip" and you need to let it out. Sometimes you need to just sit down with someone and say, "Ahhhh nuts. This fucking sucks."

So, because I'm sympathetic to the cause and have a bottomless well of goalie love to give, I'm forming a support organization for all the displaced goalies out there in the professional ranks.

Ms.Conduct's Home for Homeless Goalies offers:

• Ego massages ("You were screened, baby. Nobody could have stopped that. That puck had eyes. And have I told you the way your hair sticks out of the holes in the top of your mask is so charming? Those pads look better on you than on [rival].")
• Chocolate chip cookies during group sessions
• Jello shots during "group sessions"
  
• Warm, enthusiastic hugs that last slightly longer than your wife or girlfriend feels is really appropriate
• Laundry service (meaning, I point you to the washer and dryer and buy detergent and dryer sheets in bulk)
  

For difficult cases, we'll even get the old player helmet and stick out and give you all the helmet nuzzles and pad taps you could ever hope for.

Privacy and respect for your superstitions and charming quirks are a top priority. Fly your freak flag. We're all goalies here. We understand. Unless you're really weird, and then, well... you're on your own. (Looking at you, Pogge.)

We'll get through this together, boys.

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Occupado....

So, here I am at 2 a.m. again, kind of in disbelief at the bevy of discomforts that strep has afforded me. Tonight, my throat hurts still but isn't the main thing. It's the cough that has ramped up to ridiculous levels. And all I got for that from the doc were these little pearl things that I'm only supposed to take every 8 hours, but wear off in about 3. You do the math there. Glad the coughologists aren't trying to get people to the moon or anything. "What? We're not there yet? And we're out of gas?"

I'm about to just start swilling whatever is in the liquor cabinet, except I think all we have is tequila, vodka, and cheap amaretto. (Fuck it. I just took Nyquil.)

But I guess there are few goalies out there who wouldn't mind if I put a shot or 5 of tequila under their noses tonight.

I'm glad I'm not playing for a few days. I always get a little edgy about watching On The Fly on a "bad for goalies" night. I'm afraid seeing all those pucks go in the net equates to negative mental imagery and I will fall victim, too.

Valiquette, for one, just got shelled. You rarely see a pro tender get left in a game for 8 goals against, but Lundqvist got lit the night before and was getting a needed break. So Vali was it. It was tough to watch the highlights because they all come boom boom boom (which is sort of how my real life games go sometimes... it's like GOAL! GOAL! GOAL! Routine save, but hey, at least it was a save. GOAL! GOAL!) and don't really give any context.

Biron and the Islanders were shellacked by Fatso and the Devils. And Deslauriers got yanked from the Oilers game. And the way OTF shows them in rapid succession, you can just see the body language start to sag a little more after each goal, but then by the last one, it's like, "*shrug* Of course it went in." Man, I know that feeling so well.

Meanwhile, on a personal front, it wasn't a terrible day for my darlings out in the hockey world.

Started with the Aeros picking up a 2-1 OT win in Toronto, which was a great way to end the road trip up north. And now they have a few days to recover and practice little details like scoring goals. Dubie was good but not overly challenged (21 shots) in the effort, it seemed to me. The defense was just solid in front of him.

Then it was up to Kalamazoo (wherever the hell that is... where's my map, Ms. South Carolina?) to check in on Brusty and the Blades. When the game started, Chris Beckford-Tseu (affectionately called "Chrissy" by my hockey-going buddies back when I sat in seats where I could yell things at goalies) was in goal.

Everyone in Florida told me Blades coach Malcolm Cameron NEVER pulls a goalie (insert goalie pulling joke, because I KNOW you're all pervs like me and want to). Well, 3 goals in 15 minutes on 17 shots (really not that outrageous given the shot count) is apparently Cameron's limit and he gave CBT the hook and put Brusty in.

B-squared was concentrating hard on being the best back-up goalie possible, though, and let in a quick goal. Amazingly, down 6-2, the Blades staged a 4 goal come-back in the 3rd period and tied it up in the exciting final seconds.

Can't say I enjoyed it personally, because I was too pissed it took two periods and busting the balls of two goalies for them to finally look like they gave a damn. I'm not gonna play games here: my interest in the Everblades relates 100% to getting Brusty back in the AHL where he belongs ASAP. This means plum stats and lots of Ws, because unless you're watching how bad the defensive play is down there, you're thinking, "WTF is going on with that guy?"

So, if the Blades are gonna dish out these endless breakaways and odd-man rushes and turnovers and forechecking like you might break a nail, well, I'm gonna have to dust off the big guns. *kisses biceps*

Of course, they played their cans off in the third and OT, and then can't get any of 9 (NINE!) shootout attempts past the Kalamazoo goalie. You just put 4 past him in one period and your 9 best shooters can't beat him once? OMG. If I had a mind to lose, I'd have lost it. I'd bag skate the snot out of those guys next time there's a couple of days off.

I said tonight that I'm thisclose to launching a "Free Brusty" campaign -- I've been kinda bored with not having the old Cal for Calder campaign to annoy people with. None of this piddly button business though. I'm talking t-shirts. Problem is... don't wear them in German-speaking countries, ladies... or if you do, carry some pepper spray. I'm just saying.

In the new tradition of the T3I stick figure drawings, I'm thinking something like this:

I'm not sure if that's a croc or a gator. Not even sure what it SHOULD be. But let's just assume it's the right one.

(BTW, it's now 3:30, I'm still coughing and wide awake, but clearly... CLEARLY... not entirely lucid.)

ANYWAY...

Then, I had an eye on the box score for the Brahmas, which also went into a shootout at 3-3. Sorry to say, Jaegs had a good game but let the first three shootout shots in and doomed the skills competition for his team. But I was happy that he finally had a pretty good game in regulation and OT, and his team showed a little more discipline than usual. They've been a bunch of brawling, PIM racking-up, angry mofos since the season started. It's been tough to watch all those PP goals go in.

BTW, here's a great photo set from their game the night before (and a great, descriptive write up here) in which Joe Palmer, Jaeger's partner in goal, got in a fight with the other goalie. They actually tried to go earlier in the game and the ref broke 'em up as you can see in the earlier pics. But they finally met at center ice and Palmer had his way with the other guy. Look at the other players faces in some of the fight shots. EVERYONE loves a goalie fight, even players (maybe not the goalies though).

And I wrapped up my night with a Wild win in Colorado. Always a great thing to beat the stinking Avs in their own oxygen-depleted barn, and even greater that Lats potted one. He's been a nice addition thus far, but I'm holding my breath for the reputed "lazy" Guy to emerge. No declarations on that trade coming for a while. And Aeros call-up Jaime Sifers played quite well on defense, proving pivotal in several plays as the night went on. It was a fun one for sure.

It's 4 now. I actually fell asleep writing this (just like how you fell asleep reading it... haha) and woke up... coughing!

Fuck yeah. Sleep is for dead people and babies, bitches. If I were a character on It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, I'd totally declare myself "Awake Girl," the superhero whose amazing power is she never sleeps. And I'd make a cape out of trash bags and somehow try to make a quick buck off it, but would ultimately fail and go back to huffing glue and eating cat food.

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