Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Wrapping up my bi-polar week in net

So, I wrote a big long whiny post about Monday night, but decided it was too whiny even for me. It was really tedious, so you're welcome for sparing you.

But it suffices to say that I was absolutely fucking awful at drop-in. FUCKING. AWFUL. I think at some point I let in 10 shots in a row. I was as close to tears on the ice as I've ever been. I was standing there wondering how I was going to get undressed without bursting into tears in front of everybody, or maybe I should just head straight to the bathroom, have my cry, and then change.

How humiliating.

But my girl Cyndi showed me some love, got me to laugh, and told me to take off if I needed to. She knew I was tired from goalie clinic (which I was feeling awful after), but for some reason, I wouldn't or couldn't recognize how tired I was and just got more and more and more discouraged.

I screamed at a guy just for having his stick in my crease (haha). Just horrible melt-down.

And they were so nice about it. I owe them for that, especially as I haven't played that drop-in as well as I'd like in a few weeks. That probably was in the back of my mind fueling the melt-down.

Anyway, I was rejecting Cyndi's offers to call it quits. I was angry and I needed to prove to myself that I could stop some pucks. I needed to shake off the crisis of confidence.

So I stayed out and I stopped pretty much everything after that.

I finally snagged a really pretty one in my glove (god bless them, they've all learned to act real impressed when I make a glove save) and said, "Okay, with that... I'm DONE. See you next week!"



We had some laughs afterward and that took the edge off but I was still feeling pretty glum when I got home.

I wasn't sure how it was going to carry over tonight at Women's league. In fact, I was so rattled, my legs didn't quit shaking and my heart didn't stop pounding until the second period tonight.

But I saw a handful of shots in the first and eventually settled down, and then saw maybe 3 more shots the whole game and got another shutout (5-0 final). Can't even get excited about this one. It's nice, but doesn't mean a whole lot when you see so few shots.

So, this means we're in the championship week after next, likely with Captain Danglemitt's team, so that will be an epic battle. But this is one where I literally have to just think of it as enjoying one last game with these girls as my teammates and savor every minute. Fully intend to drink my face off after that one, too. It's gonna be a blast, regardless of who wins.

Enjoying the process.

Couple of funny things from the night:

It was CRAZY humid at Space City. The glass was sweating, the ice had a layer of fog hovering over it.... and it was raining. Not even kidding. As I stood there, bored out of my mind, I could just hear it -- drip, drip, drip -- all around my crease and up the center of the ice. On my helmet, on my back, on my net. Drip, drip, drip.

Also, because I was so nervous in the first, I was fighting the puck, so while I made the saves, they weren't pretty. So I was trying to settle myself down and what came to mind?

HONEY BADGER.

Cuz honey badger don't give a shit. I'mma be like honey badger! Can't get enough honey badger.



And with that, tomorrow morning I'm off to Dallas to spend time with my family and see the Blue Jays. I hope those bats keep going the next two days! They're kicking ass in Dallas!

5 comments:

klemmer  April 27, 2011 at 8:04 AM  

Shutouts are shutouts. You have no control over the number of shots you see, but you stopped all of them.

Easy for me to say, but relax, enjoy the ride and quit being so hard on yourself.

After all, you're NOT Roberto Luongo!

Enjoy Dallas and the ball games!

Dee  April 27, 2011 at 8:57 AM  

I'm with Klemmer - a shutout is a shutout so stand proud in that crease! And better yet, way to hang in there on Monday night when it felt like everything was crumbling around you. That's your real win for the week. Giving up is easy, sticking it out takes balls...um - ovaries...um, well - you know what I mean...

Have a great time celebrating your birthday with baseball and family!

Ms. Conduct  April 27, 2011 at 9:04 AM  

Yeah, that's just how I roll. Suck, beat self up, overcome, etc etc. Happens WAY less than it used to.

And yeah, Dee, you're right. Sticking it out Monday night and getting some stops WAS the victory for sure.

Enjoying the process. :)

klemmer  April 27, 2011 at 2:21 PM  

Punch Imlach once asked "Why stop the first one if you're not going to get a shutout?"

Soooooooooo, the solution is easy- let the first one by and then you won't have to beat yourself up after the game!

you're welcome!

Ms. Conduct  April 27, 2011 at 3:20 PM  

Well, I certainly wasn't beating myself up for not having a harder time getting the shutout. Just saying, it's not one to write home about.

My lack of composure Monday night is what I was really beating myself up about.

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